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Baby Sleep ScheduleWhen it comes to a baby sleep schedule there are several schools of thought and depending on which side of the fence you stand it can become quite a controversial issue. The two extreme views on parenting are: Parenting on schedule and Parenting on demand. As you can imagine one advocates a firmer approach to babies and sleep and the other a more gentle approach to babies sleeping. It is impossible to say that there is one approach that is right for all families. Each baby is different and families are different. You must choose the approach that feels right for you and your baby. In my experience many parents fall somewhere between both of these extremes and at different times find themselves swinging closer to parenting on schedule or parenting on demand. I believe however that it is important to not begin any form of a schedule with a newborn. I found that it felt right for me to take my cues from my new born baby. I really believe that he knew what he needed.I watched him learning furiously in those first few weeks and I wanted him to learn above all else that when he cried I would be there. I could never imagine trying to putting my newborn onto a baby sleep schedule. I decided that whatever schedule he was on was fine for me and this felt right. There have been many books written about getting your baby to sleep. Some experts are helping families find a middle ground such as The Baby Whisperer, Tracy Hogg. She advocates an approach which is more middle of the road she says:"What is more E.A.S.Y is central to a whole-family approach, because it ensures that every member's needs are met, not just the baby's. You listen and observe carefully, respecting your baby's needs, and, at the same time, you acclimatise him or her to family life" (P.42, Secrets of the Baby Whisperer) The following table is found in Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. It gives a quick look at the two extreme parenting views and offers a middle ground one. This shows the on demand and schedule in their extreme and I really do think it is possible to use both of these approaches without being quite so rigid as this table recommends.
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| Following whatever Baby demands - feeding 10 to 12 times a day as Baby cries | Flexible but structured routine that spans a 2 1/2 to 3 hr period of eating, activity, sleep, and "you" time. | Clock-watching to conform to a predetermined timetable of regular feedings, usually 3-4 hrs apart |
| Unpredictable - Baby takes the lead | Predictable - parents set a pace that Baby can follow and Baby knows what to expect | Predictable but anxiety-provoking, which Baby may not follow |
| Parents don't learn to interpret Baby's signals; many cries misinterpreted as hunger | Because it's logical, parents can anticipate Baby's need and therefore are more likely to understand the different cries | Cries may be ignored if they don't learn to interpret Baby's signals |
| Parents have no life-Baby sets the schedule | Parents can plan their lives | Parents are ruled by the clock |
| Parents feel confused; there is often chaos in the house | Parents feel more confident about their own parenting because they understand their child's cues and cries | Parents often feel guilty, anxious, even angry if Baby doesn't conform to the schedule |
What to Expect - The First Year, p. 251 states:
Many babies don't fall smoothly into any schedule at all, even past three months. Their wake, eat, and sleep pattern is totally random from day to day. If your baby is one of these you'll have to decide whether you want to take the initiative by trying to make the parts of his life you do have some control over as organized as possible or whether you want to take a laissez-faire attitude towards scheduling.
Are you considering putting your baby onto a baby sleep schedule? Why?
Is it because you have been told by family or friends that you 'should'. If this is the case I strongly encourage you to go back to deciding what feels right for you and your family. The way we parent has changed over time and a baby sleep schedule may have worked well for your mother but may not be necessary for you.
Is the reason that you are considering a baby sleep schedule because you are having problems with your baby sleeping and think that a baby sleep schedule may be the answer?
In The No-Cry Sleep Solution, p.18 Elizabeth Pantley suggests:"The irrefutable truth is that we cannot change a comfortable, loving-to-sleep (but waking-up-all-night) history to a go-to-sleep-and-stay-asleep-on-your-own routine without one of two things: crying or time. Personally I choose time."
If you have an older baby and feel that you want to try 'time' then I suggest the No-Cry Sleep Solution. You can also read other books that offer a more gentle approach to sleep.
If you would like to know how to implement a baby sleep schedule then you can try some of the following sleep books to help you establish an effective baby sleep schedule.It may be that what you need to implement are effective baby sleep patterns or baby sleep habits rather than needing to try strict baby sleep training methods.
Recommended Baby Sleep Downloads
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The Baby Sleep SolutionInstead of spending hours and hours reading and researching how to solve these problems, simply listen to a practical "Talking Book"! Listen to the audio program on your iPod, on your computer or any mp3 player and discover how to solve these baby sleep problems quickly. |
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How To Get Your Baby To Sleep Throught The Night-- Robin Ariola You can instantly download “How to Get Your Baby to Sleep Through the Night – In a Weekend!” from this website and start training your baby to sleep all night, starting tonight. You don’t have to wait for the weekend! Click Here! |
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