By:Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam 2001, Parent-Wise Solutions
The back cover of
'On Becoming Baby
Wise' states that it is an "exciting infant management plan that
successfully and naturally trains children to sleep through the night
before the age of eight weeks." Now what parent wouldn't want
their baby to sleep through the night from the age of eight
weeks?
When I began reading 'On Becoming Baby Wise' I
have to be honest and say I was a complete sceptic. The approach I had
used with my baby had been more closely linked to 'attachment
parenting' and this book spends far too much time, in my
opinion, trying
to point out the reasons why 'attachment parenting' is NOT the approach
to follow.
The authors of the
Baby Wise book state that their approach falls somewhere between hyper
scheduling and
attachment parenting. It starts with a chapter titled 'Your
Baby Needs a Family' and while of course I do agree with this, the
comment "marriage represents a special bond between two people that is
matched by no other relationship (p. 20)" might not sit well with
everyone. However it is not hard to agree with the conclusion
that a strong relationship between the parents of the child is the
starting point for successful parenting.
'On Becoming Baby Wise
',
like many other sleep approaches, links feeding and sleeping closely
together. The authors state that an approach to feeding which
is more user friendly than say 'attachment parenting' is parent
directed feeding (PDF). With this approach a mother feeds her
baby when he is hungry yet guides his hunger patterns by
establishing a basic routine.
Now I
would have to say I was
the classic mother who 'demand' fed her baby. I loved demand
feeding my newborn, but I know there came a time when I would have
dearly loved to have some order in our lives too and so I read about
PDF with interest. We all have to decide which philosophy is
going to be right for our family (which this book does point out)and
PDF may or may not be the answer for you. After reading this
book I was left thinking I would like to try PDF with my next baby.
FEED,
PLAY, SLEEP…..yes another book which teaches this
order. I
however failed to follow this order with my son and hence to say I
attribute this to the huge problems I have faced trying to get him
sleep. The Baby Wise book gives parents a step by step
approach to
follow to have your baby sleeping through the night. Once again
advocates of attachment parenting will not be impressed as it is
opposed to sleeping with your baby, using props to getting your baby to
sleep, and nursing your baby to sleep.
This
book also is pro leaving your baby to cry, but helps you to understand
your baby's cry and know when to respond. I have experienced
first hand how teaching my son to sleep was successful after leaving
him to cry, so I am not opposed to this at all. But I believe
that this book is encouraging mothers to leave their babies to cry when
they are too young. I did not start this until my son was
over one year. This book on the other hand is starting with
babies as young as 4 weeks and in my mind this is far too
young. We all need to decide what is best for us.
Largely,
the Baby Wise book, guides you in establishing your babies
routine. A
chapter on multiple births has also been written by a mother of
triplets, twins and two singletons. The book ends with a
chapter called 'Problem Solving and I found this section very helpful
in summarising the key points of the book.
'Parenting
Potpourri' is the final chapter which lists topics for new
parents. I wonder about the relevance for this chapter in the
book as I felt it was largely a place for the authors to state their
own opinions. I took offense at the section on circumcision.
Is this really relevant to a book on teaching sleep? The book
states that infant circumcision is not the traumatic experience that
some portray because it will not stay in the memory of the baby more
than the heel prick test(p195). I wonder how the authors feel
they are able to make such a claim here, as it certainly is not what I
read in my child development text book and I do find this very hard to
believe.
In essence I would recommend the baby wise book to parents who are about to have a baby.
It is however more of an approach that would need to be started from
birth rather than being one that parents could pick up and run with an
older child. I found that much of it rang true to me and I believe that
I would re-read this book before I have my next
baby. There are some good basics in here for
following a firmer
approach to sleeping and feeding
from day one and I
think that for number two baby it would be a good guide.
Read a response to 'The Baby Wise Book' from a mother of twins
I have twin boys and they are now 6 years old. I read this book while
pregnant with them and this is my comment to all new moms.
"This book literally made my life so much easier… I now go back and see
the way my kids behave and the way other kids do and I’m very happy I
did what I had to do. Read more
Please share your reviews or thoughts of the Baby Wise Book with us. We would love to incude them on our site.
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